Expectation-Disappointment

The amount of disappointment that we feel, in any situation, is largely self-designed. How? Because we suffer only as much disappointment as we allow ourselves to expect.

If my expectation-level is one hundred-- very, very serious and invested heavily-- then, my disappointment will be also one hundred-- very agonizing and severe. But if I can cut back my expectations to a level of only fifty-- if I can teach myself to expect with a power of only half-- then I immediately cut in half my feelings of disappointment.

Even the best, or most spiritual, mind probably cannot cut expectation to zero. And that might not be even desirable. Certainly it is not realistic.

But, if we can, most of the time, with most people, under most circumstances, minimize our expectations of others, and of events, we can also minimize disappointment.

Example: If you ask a teen to do something, and you do not really expect her to do it, then, you feel no disappointment when the job is not done. This works with everybody.

The good news: With a little awareness and monitoring (mindfulness), we can voluntarily remind ourselves to form minimal expectations. Since expectation is the cause of disappointment, and we can control our expectation-formation, we can then regulate the level of disappointment in our lives.

This really does work. Just give it a try, and it will prove itself. The next time that you find yourself expecting certain results, from a condition, event, or person, try to ratchet down the expectation. Then, if it is successful, you can celebrate with as great an intensity and joy as you want. But, if the enterprise fails, you can cut way back on your pain.

This is a good example of practical applied spirituality. Try it, expecting nothing from yourself,and you will see very happy results.